Where Do I Fit In?: The Lamentations of a Young Artist

Dear Mr. Walker…
Dear Author…
Hey Guy who wrote us …

We regret to inform you …
Unfortunately we will not be able to…
You didn’t get in…

Um…so, this has been the summation of my journey as an artist. No, let me rephrase, this has been summation of my journey to get signed as an artist. What do you mean artist? I am talking about as a singer/songwriter and author.
(The following statement is full of bias)I am the author of one of the hottest novels out entitled The Gallery. I have been on a magnificent journey this past year. I met people who don’t, never have and never will exist. Yet, these characters seem so real to me. They are like family. Their names are Terry, Seth (the main character), Marshall, Donnie, Darius, Grams, Dr. Steve and Ruben. These people have become just as real as my co-workers, church family, immediate family and random strangers that I see in passing.
This has been one of the most trying years of my life. Birthing this book has caused me some extreme pain, inexplicable pleasure and a long list of other emotions that fall somewhere in between. And, I won’t lie to you, it is hard, after all the work that I have put into the book, to not have it received as quickly as I imagined.
I have been submitting query letters to Literary Agents all over the nation. I have received a couple of form letters. But, I have also received a couple of emails from actual agents. They say, for the most part, that the book is good but they don’t feel they would be a good fit to represent it. I have tried marketing as a straight fiction book, a Christian fiction book, an inspirational book and a Young Adult fiction book. No hits!
Usually, I would take this one of two ways. First, I would sulk! I would have a huge pity party about how unfair life is when you live in my world. Second, I would take this as confirmation that I was never supposed to write a book. I would probably go into my whole, “I will probably be miserable behind a desk my whole life,” monologue. But, some thing in me has changed…no pity parties this time around. God spoke to me quite frankly about pity parties, He said, “You don’t have time for them. Take a hit and get up.”
Though literary agents have not been quick to see the greatness in this piece that does not negate its value. My spiritual father, Pastor Elton Monday, has spoken into my life concerning the book on several occasions. And, all I can say is, since the man of God said it, it has to come to pass.
For years, people have been trying to figure out where in the heck to put me. I don’t sound like everyone else when I sing. I don’t write like everyone else. I am hard to label, hard to market, it seems. Coincidentally, it feels like, for the first time ever I think I am right where I need to be. I may not be on the New York Time’s Best-seller’s list now but there is coming a time for greatness. I may not be a known songwriter now but there is a coming a time where I will be able to write for artists. Though nothing outwardly expresses these things, I have a feeling that, soon and very soon, God is going to blow my mind and those who failed to find a place for me.
I got up a few minutes ago and was led to read Psalms 92. The passage speaks to the demise of the unrighteous that seem like they are flourishing. It also encourages the righteous that in due season they shall be established. What I love the most about the whole passage, comes in about verse 13…it speaks of the righteous tree bearing fruit at an old age. I believe that I have enough creativity to write vampire stories or erotica or stories about witches and warlocks, but I won’t. I can’t even say that there have not been times where I have been tempted to take a job in some questionable genres and simply use a pseudonym. All because I love writing and I am not easy to place. However, I am encouraged to simply wait until the Lord opens a door. I am contented in staying planted as a tree of righteousness. For I know, that by being planted in Him, I will still bear fruit when other trees that where placed first are dying off.